Christian Marriage Help: Five Signs Your Marriage Involves Unhealthy Submission

This Christian marriage aid gives you five signs that your marriage involves unhealthy submission. Submission works in conjunction with the husband loving his wife as his own body and as Christ loves the church (Ephesians 5: 22-33). It is not God’s intention for a wife to be abused, neglected, controlled, or mistreated. Here are five signs you can use to assess the health of your association:

Your husband does not ask what you think about things or consider his comments to be as important as his. Submission is meant to be a partnership in which both people are equally important. Leadership implies that the husband directs and protects his wife and family. A man who does not care what his wife thinks about things and who ignores, represses or neglects her opinion is not acting with love; he is taking advantage of her.

Your husband does things that he knows will hurt you. God intended for a wife to be loved, cared for, and treated gently and gently by a man who recognizes that she is more emotionally sensitive than he is and needs to be protected. A man who is hard on his wife and is willing to hurt her without caring is not loving his wife the way God intended.

Your husband uses submission to shut you down and control you. Submission is not a way to terrorize a wife. It is not meant to give the man a trump card to play every time he wants to control his wife. Men who abuse submission use it as a way to manipulate their wives into getting their way by using it as a power play. Men often blame their wives for all the problems simply claiming that if she submitted more, that is, not speaking her mind, not holding him accountable, and not giving her opinion, then there would be no marital problems.

Your husband does not submit to you. Ephesians 5:21 says that we should all submit to one another. This give and take characterizes all relationships and does not exclude the husband from submitting to his wife. If your husband never gives up on you, never gives up his preferences, and never allows you to make decisions, then it is not a healthy submission.

You don’t feel loved or cared for. When a marriage is as God intended, a wife will know that she is loved and appreciated. If you don’t feel loved or cared for by your husband, then it is a sign that your marriage is in trouble and that your husband is not doing his part to love you. If you are submitting and are not loved in return, your presentation is probably unbalanced.