Sample Letter That Worked To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back

Okay, let’s not waste time. When the women leave, they are practically gone. Getting one back is not an easy business. We’re not even going to start talking about how you lost her in the first place or if you should care about a woman who’s gone. Let’s assume that, for whatever reason, you’ve made the decision to exert the energy. That is all.

There are entire books and video series devoted to this topic, so this article is for one specific situation, but the principles are essentially useful in many other scenarios. This effective note was used on a woman I met on an internet dating site. We weren’t very involved, but she had “shut down” and told me to take a walk. The more attractive the woman, the more likely they are to banish men for petty crimes. That’s not always the case, it’s just one of many reasons. But I was sure I could still have a future with the woman, so I drafted an email that brought her back within 2 hours. And I am very specific about the use of the word “composite”. Because each word and punctuation was specifically chosen to have a good result.

Having said this; I come from a place of sincerity. My feeling is that gimmicks or scams can be effective, but they come at a cost. To both parties. So I took all my personal skill AND did some reading to freshen up and refine my tactics. I flipped through 3 books. How to Win Friends and Influence People Carnegie, Make Anyone Do Anything by Lieberman, and You Can Save a Relationship by Pemo. Now, I’ll admit that the titles of those books DON’T SEEM to be staples of honest communication, but how you choose to use a thing is up to you.

Below is the note I wrote and below each of the three paragraphs are my comments and explanations indicated by my initials and these brackets. [DR-like this]. To begin with, the note had to be short, it had to seem spontaneous. It should NOT look like you are pouring out your heart.

LETTER

None of my emails were from you this week. So I guess you were actually serious! Well, I hope you won’t let my misjudgment sour your perspective on online dating. You mentioned once that you haven’t been deeply happy for a while and I hope I was able to make the experience (mostly) a positive one for you and that you don’t stop looking. I enjoy it and have met some great people and I hope you will too. [DR-I let a week go by. Too much time and they move on, too soon is obviously a bad choice. I subtly convey that others are getting in touch with me and that I just happen to notice nothing from her. And then I basically say goodbye and good luck. Next I focus on HER needs, she wants happiness and I remind her that WE were getting her there. I close out this section not by wishing her luck with a new man but “people” and a reminder that I’m out there being social with folks].

I messed up and misunderstood our jokes, but I wanted you to know that bringing unhappy feelings into your life is literally the opposite of what I wanted to do for you, and people’s feelings are very important to me. Sometimes I assume too much. I see a strong woman and I forget that emotions are more delicate, and I’ll feel bad if she knew I upset you. [DR-Now I take my lumps. Admitting you’re responsible is NOT the same as apologizing. You have to be very careful when apologizing with women as a single man. If you seem too weak things can go downhill. But you notice I also compliment a non-physical feature she has].

I think you bring a lot to the table with your loyalty, honesty, and strength. Those were the qualities I was hoping to build on (although a little more forgiveness wouldn’t kill you!) It’s in my nature to correct my wrong turns, so I wanted to send you this message. Of course, if you were just trying to send a message that I put my foot in my mouth, I got it! [DR-Point out her good attributes you recognize without fawning. I also show I wanted “us” to do the relationship together-but past tense of course. A little humor to show I’m cool with it ending. Then I imply things might be repairable, and the message was off the cuff. And I close with a face-saving way for her to come back].

So, as I said, this situation is specific, but the strategy is essentially far-reaching. There are a lot of blogs where people talk about online dating websites that I read because people tend to pass on their experiences, and that’s a good way to see what works and doesn’t work for people.